How to Become a Full Professor

I came across a humorous article by Stanford professor John Perry that I’m sure I’ve read before (according to the copyright it’s been on the web for over 10 years), but it actually means something now that I’m in grad school. Here’s the takeaway:

The trick, then, is to get a job based on work you haven’t done, and stick around until the details of what you did are forgotten. That’s when the true rewards of academia set in.

Future professors, if you’re curious about the road to tenure, read on! Current professors, if you say “Hogwash!”, tell us why it isn’t so.

Just to fess up, I reached this article from a Lifehacker post about Perry’s Structured Procrastination article, which I remember reading last year. For the record, his approach to procrastination doesn’t suit me at all.