I wrote earlier about Turks’ attitudes toward Americans, and there’s no doubting that the Israel-Lebanon war worsened the trend. I haven’t been surprised to see banners in some parts of town saying “Each of us is Palestinian,” or booths set up with gory war photos where students are collecting signatures against Israel and the U.S.
But I was surprised by what arrived in my inbox a couple weeks ago.
It was a message from a Turkish friend I’ve known for almost seven years. Each summer we get together at least once and have a few drinks, talk about the good old days, and catch up on the latest news, usually with a few of his friends.
The first part of his email welcomed me back to Istanbul and covered the usual territory of work and family, but he ended his message like this:
I’d really like to sit and chat with you, but my friends here (including me) are angry at America and think that America is a baby killer. They don’t drink Coke, and they don’t smoke Marlboros.
Maybe we can meet next year if conditions improve.
I wrote back saying that his friends are right not to buy Coke and Marlboros; at least they’re sticking to their principles. But to equate an old friend who happens to be American with American politicians and policies is ridiculous. I gave him my phone number and said I was available if he wanted to meet.
I waited two weeks to write about this because I thought there was a chance that he’d call and we’d get together.
It didn’t happen.
Now I’m left wondering what this means on a larger scale…and it doesn’t look good.
Has anyone else experienced something like this?
8 comments ↓
well, thinking about myself, i dont see any wrong with chatting to a friend about world politics even if you dont agree with him/her. it is always good to have an alternative view about whats going on, especially if you want to be informed about their arguments. actually this reminded me that i should write a few words to a lady who wotks for IMF in USA who used to be a fine friend but we havent talked for about a year.
my friend has another idea… he says “everybody say marlboro made in usa, don’t smoke… than, i smoking turkish cigarette now. but it’s very bad and i m coughing all day. maybe real americans plan this; they want to be, we die than shortcut… they say to us, you don’t use our cigarette(marlboro), and use yours, and kill quickly… this is real american plan…”
what do you say :)))
Yikes, this sounds very harsh! And it’s a really scary reality check. Your friend is falling into the very dangerous trap of generalizing too much. How can you possibly equate the politics of a country with each individual person who happens to hold its passport, including a person you have known for years?! Wow. I would be extremely disappointed in this friend (in addition to being disappointed by the situation more generally speaking). It is incredibly narrow-minded. It’s one thing not to buy certain products, I can even understand maybe not travelling to a certain country, but to stop talking to people you know and have been friends with for years because they happen to be from a particular place, OUCH! No, fortunately nothing like this has happened to me. I’m really sorry to hear about this experience.
hi eszter,
i think, he made a joke about that. but he really don’t use amerikan produce, after than irak and lubnan. you re right, i think like you. but many people see and live only politics and they make a protest only like this.
don’t worry, this is only his joke… but, it’s cold joke, i know.
Super hero: Right on. That’s exactly what I say.
Figen: Ah, now that’s the kind of Middle Eastern conspiracy theory I’ve come to know and love! Bravo!
(By the way, I think Eszter was responding to my post and not your comment…just wanted to clear up any confusion.)
Eszter: Disappointed was exactly how I felt. I had to reread his message several times just to check that I hadn’t missed something, but it was all pretty clear. And I just couldn’t believe it. I still can’t.
Sorry to hear about your friend’s reaction. I am not sure it is part of a larger trend, though. At least not with me and I assure you, I am a very pissed-off Lebanese at the moment. I also haven’t heard of something of the sort happening to any American friends.
I hope it will blow over soon with your friend.
Hi T.A.H.,
Thanks for your comment. You might be right. Up until this experience I’ve always found people in Turkey and the Middle East to be exceptionally good at distinguishing between governments and civilians. That’s why my friend’s email caught me off guard.
Let’s see what happens…
It’s Okay, we are not greeted well abroad and it’s not anything you did. Quite frankly, European countries have really taken a holier than thou attitude towards us. Turkey still does not admit to a certain genocide and the French particpated in the Rwandan genocide. The truth is out there.
P. S. I love how everyone hates us and does not welcome us abroad but still expects us to intervene in Tibet, Sudan, Lebanon, etc., while we learn six languages, take more vacation time, donate to more charities and save all the polar bears. It’s really getting ridiculous!
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