As Seen On TV: What not to write in your introduction

Yesterday I encountered the literary equivalent of a late-night infomercial — an author making claims about his book that even Ron Popeil would find excessive.  Here’s the pitch from the intro:

“The style of English used in this book is simple, clear, and emphatic.  Any reader will be happy to continue reading the book, chapter after chapter, without feeling tired or exhausted; it is neither monotonous nor redundant.  It is a very enjoyable way to get more and new knowledge.  This book is for every member of any family.  Finally, it is for YOU too.”

But wait, there’s more!

The author is prolific, as can be seen from the list of his publications on the back of the book:

1. Book of Al-Khutab
2. Islamic orations
3. Orations from the Pulpit
4. Chronicle of Khutab
5. Dietary Regulations and Food Habits of Muslims
6. Overeating and Behavior
7. Islam on Alcohol
8. Alcohol in Beverages, Drugs, Foods and Vitamins
9. Cheese
10. AFTO and FAO
11. Fasting in Islam
12. Food and Overpopulation
13. Honey: A food and a Medicine
14. Gelatine in Foods
15. Shortening in Foods
16. A Manual on Food Shortenings
17. Pork: Possible Reasons for its Prohibitions
18. Food Supplementation
19. World Health Organization for Muslim Nations
20. A Muslim Guide to Food Ingredients
21. Natural Therapeutics of Medicine in Islam (co-authored)
22. Islamic Dietary Laws and Practices (co-authored)
23. Islamic Fundamentalism (co-authored)

Now how much would you pay?

More power to this guy for tackling so many diverse subjects, but he has left me skeptical about these other titles — I was not happy to continue reading the first one.